Shortly after my last post, my mother took me to a weight loss clinic where I was evaluated by a team of experts trained to withstand the gag reflex brought about by being in the presence of a topless fatass such as myself. I found out that while I am overall pretty healthy, my overall weight and fat-to-muscle ratio are nowhere near normal.
In response to this, I am being put on a meal replacement plan which limits my caloric intake to 800 calories a day using the Optifast meal replacement program.
The Optifast website provided the nutrition facts of the meal replacement shakes I’ll be drinking:
- Calories 160
- Protein (g) 14
- Carbohydrate (g) 20
- Fat (g) 3
- Sodium (mg) 220
- Potassium (mg) 470
- Fiber (g) 0
- Vitamins & Minerals 10-30% of RDI
- Lactose (g) <1
The doctor said I can expect to lose roughly 46 lbs by the end of the summer on that alone and can expect to lose even more by exercising. The meal replacements will be costing me around $120 a week which, while it is no small amount, is less than I would normally spend on unhealthy food.
This ordeal scares me for a couple of reasons:
- It is going to suck. Last year I was able to lose 10 lbs in one week through a calorie-restrictive diet and found myself at a point where I was going to pass out after only seven days. I go through food withdrawal for sure and am expecting to be highly irritable and whiny for at least the next two weeks.
- Spending this amount of money on losing weight puts the pressure on me to keep that weight off out of fear of wasting all the money I’ve invested in the process.
- I have to go back to college soon. I’m going to be faced with a lot of tough choices made even tougher by the fact that meals become social gatherings in residence halls. My absence would be like not being there for a family dinner. I’m going to have to build up my willpower quiet a bit.
- I just don’t trust myself. I’m a fatty by nature, I really am. I’m going to need to change my thinking so that by the time I begin to transition off of the meal replacements I have indoctrinated myself into making the right choices naturally. This means I’m going to really have to educate myself on portion sizes and healthy eating.
- Frankly, I’m just tired and scared. I’m taking two summer school classes and will be auditioning for the title character in the musical Shrek. The combination of these things will be a real test of my inner strength which I feel that I really need at this point in life.
Despite all this, I have a wonderful support network of family and friends who will help me get through these challenging few weeks. I feel incredibly grateful not only to them but for the support this site has gotten from others in the health and fitness community. It’s hard to be optimistic given my track record and current condition but realistically all I have to do to lose weight is eat which given my alternatives isn’t the worst route I could have taken. I feel prepared to give this my best shot. Let’s hope for the best.
~I’ll be feeding you seconds in no time,